mixed media, Poem

The Need


The Need - Poem on mixed media
The Need – Poem on mixed media

You have made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless, until they can find rest in you. ~Augustine

I am very affected by climate changes. When it’s sunny and warm, I am happy and full of life. When it is cold and grey, I am lethargic and down. Actually, I get very depressed.

I love the quote above by Augustine. It reminds me that my deepest needs can not be met in the material, nor by me. It reminds me that I need to run to one that is greater than me.

This poem was birthed out of deep depression and great need. It reminds me of what King David wrote in the Psalms; “Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me?”

He spoke to his own soul; so I did the same.  I went to the one that is higher than I and poured out my heart. And you know what? I found rest, comfort and reassurance. My mind was no longer playing tricks on me. I decided I was not going to be a prisoner to the screams in my mind and the tightness in my heart. That doesn’t mean that negative feelings never come back, but they can’t control me.

How do you deal with negative feelings?

mixed media, poetry, Uncategorized

Color me Green


Color me Green
Color me Green – Part 6 of a 9 part poem on mixed media

Did you know that green is the easiest color for the eyes to process? It is said to evoke growth, healing, peacefulness and calm. It’s the color of life and renewal. It is a secondary color, meaning it is made up of two primary colors – yellow and blue. It gets it’s optimism from yellow, and it’s peacefulness from blue.

It’s no wonder that my focus is on the green girl right now, because green is known to balance emotions. I have struggled for a number of years with… er, um… we don’t really know. I suffered with extreme insomnia for years, and finally did something about it when I wasn’t falling asleep until daybreak the next day. There were thoughts of it being depression, bi-polar disorder, anxiety disorder and ADHD. I had been on medication since 2004 because of it, however I was having some undesirable side effects. My doctor decided to change medications because of it. I was suppose to slowly wean myself off of the medication I was already taking in order to start the new one.

When I started lowering the dosage, I began feeling down, depressed and a bit irritated. I went to see a friend a couple of days into this and her sisters were there visiting. I told them about what I was going through and they prayed for me. Since then, my mood completely changed. Even my husband was shocked by how tranquil and easy going I had become. I’m still weaning myself off of it, but I really don’t think I’ll have to start the other meds.

Yes, I think green is a wonderful color. Balanced emotions for someone who has been unbalanced for so long is a huge delight.

Have you ever struggled with unbalanced emotions? What do you do to deal with them?

 

 

mixed media, poetry

A Caged Bird


Caged Bird 2

Childhood is a very important time in a person’s life. Those who raise children can either make or break them. If broken during these fragile, formative years, the outcome can be drastic. It can take a whole lifetime to heal, and oftentimes there are wounds that scar until death.

Do you agree with the above?

 

 

mixed media, poetry

Wings to fly


Wings to Fly

I’m of the belief that we live in a fallen, fractured world of many broken people and fragmented value systems. Not trying to be a downer. Really. I write this because of what I’ve been dealing with lately. Like many, the world over, their childhoods weren’t a time of happy-go-lucky and peaches and cream. I lived in fear of my dad, and don’t know what it means to have/feel affection towards him. I’m not one to lick past wounds and wallow in sorrow over these events. However, I do recognize that our upbringing shapes us and makes us into who we eventually become as adults. For example, my mom used to make my brothers and me watch documentaries on what drugs can do to someone. I’m so glad she did, because although I dabbled in a little experimentation in my youth, drugs always frightened the heck out of me. Thanks mom. Another example. I grew up in fear of my dad. He was a broken alcoholic and had many unhealthy issues that were never dealt with. Because of that, my childhood was robbed from me. Because of that, my idea of family was distorted and messed up.

Lately I’ve been actively working on finding healing in this area. When I was a fairly new Christian, I would leave for work in the morning at peace, after spending some quiet time with God. By the time I got home, I was a bundle of anxiety. When I felt anxious, I always thought I was doing something wrong and that God didn’t approve of. One day He showed me that I fear him the way I feared my dad, and that was revelatory for me. Now I’m starting to see even deeper issues and working on healing from that.

How about you? Do you believe that we live in a broken world? Do you think that our upbringing makes a huge difference on our emotional and mental well-being?


On a happy note, I’m super excited that I’m doing this mixed media course. The above piece is from the first class. Have a great weekend. 🙂

poetry

The Need


The Need

You have made us for yourself, and our hearts are restless, until they can find rest in you.
~Augustine

I am very affected by climate changes. When it’s sunny and warm, I am happy and full of life. When it is cold and grey, I am lethargic and down. Actually, I get very depressed. Being that we are entering our winter here in Brazil, the temperatures are dropping, and sometimes it’s grey.

I love this above quote by Augustine. It reminds me that my deepest needs can not be met in the material, nor by me. It reminds me that I need to run to one that is greater than myself.

This poem was birthed out of deep depression and great need. I remembered something that the King of Israel wrote sometime between the 900s and 1000s B.C.
“Why are you downcast, O my soul? Why so disturbed within me?”
He spoke to his own soul. So I did the same. And I went to the one that is higher than I and poured out my heart. And you know what? I found rest. I found comfort. I found reassurance. My mind was no longer playing tricks on me. I decided I wasn’t going to be a prisoner to the screams in my mind and the tightness in my heart.

Are you affected by weather and climate changes? Do you suffer with depression? How do you deal with it?

Culture, Poem

Heart Ticks


Heart Ticks

I was watching a Ted Talk on Youtube late one night a couple of weeks ago. Paul Morgan was the speaker and his topic was, “How postmodern humans can wake up and find their groove.” There were a number of different things he said that really impacted me, such as:

–We live in a culture that nourishes distractions.

–The world we’re heading towards is of social and ecological chaos.

–A place without nature, eating food out of machines (like The Jetsons)

–A world full of high-tech stuff without a decent planet to put it on.

He said that we needed to start putting an emphasis on ‘being more’, instead of ‘buying more’ (really becoming happy not working hard, and then eating pills to become happy).

When I started to write this poem, I didn’t know where I was going with it. However, as I progressed with it, I knew I wanted to touch on this subject of depression and modern culture.

What do you think about Paul Morgan’s words? Do you agree, or disagree with what he said? Do you believe that a lot of the reason we are seeing an epidemic of depression is because of working too hard, aquiring too many things (hoping that they’ll bring happiness), and a falling away from values that were held in high regard in the past, especially during pre-indrustrial times (community, hospitality, etc.)?

Culture, Poem

Urban Melody/Melodia Urbana


Urban MelodyMelodia Urbana

This poem is my first collaboration with Adriano Yamamoto, a very talented Brazilian poet. We wrote this poem together considering issues of modern society, consumerism and the lack of affection and human connection. After reading Culture Monk’s post, I just knew this was the topic to go with.

How does this poem make you feel? Do you believe that modern living causes us to isolate ourselves? Do you believe that it’s a huge contributor to the depression epidemic?